people may not know about me is i have borderline personality disorder.
I was recently detained again and during my discharge meeting something got to me, which is the reason I am writing a blog on this topic. The thing that got to me was that people spoke about me like i am an illness rather than that i have one. They spoke about me and my behavior and personality as if it is defined by an illness, which it isn’t. I am the person i am because i am me, not because of an illness.
I love art, pink, chocolate and the sound of rain against the window at night and i hate moths, spicy food and switches left on! (or any other electrical appliance which isn’t being used really). I don’t love or hate any of these things because of this illness, i love and hate them because i am me and this illness is just another part of me.
In my meeting people sat there and kept saying ‘people with BPD this’ and ‘people with BPD that’ like everyone is a certain way or dose certain things because of an illness, that we are not individuals, with our own choices and personalities. I know mental illness often influence the way people behave, as it has done me. I was never like how i am now.
But i guess the thing i am trying to get across is that I am still a person with their own personality, likes and dislikes, no matter what is wrong with me. I am still me, I am just me plus an illness.
(Originally written November 2013 – this was written before my diagnosis of BPD was removed).