A strangers house in the middle of the night

This time about 14 years ago I was taken into care for the first time.
My mum was ill and even then I knew she drank a lot and got angry. It’s strange how much I remember of the night but not the later days.

I stood in the middle of the storm of frenzied anger and violence at 5 years old while the whole world around me was being smashed to pieces. Trying to stop her trying to hug her but being pushed back by the force.
The last image I have of my mum that night is her being surrounded completely by smashed glass, being wrestled by police while screaming one of the worst screams I’ve ever heard in my life and can still here ringing in my ears to this day.

I can still feel the emotion of that night. The pain and fear. As I was carried away from the house, by a man I didn’t know, screaming for all my life was worth. It is one moment in my life I’m not sure I will ever be able to forget. Ending up on a strangers door step. In their home. As a young child is one of the most surreal things you will ever experience.


(originally written June 2015).


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